Advertising Lingo

These are “quotes” from the wonderful world of advertising.

  • NEW! — Different color from previous design.
  • ALL NEW! — Parts are not interchangeable with previous design.
  • brush salesman
  • EXCLUSIVE! — Imported product.
  • UNMATCHED! — Almost as good as the competition.
  • FOOLPROOF OPERATION! — No provision for adjustments.
  • ADVANCED DESIGN! — The advertising agency doesn’t understand it.
  • IT’S HERE AT LAST! — Rush job. Nobody knew it was coming.
  • FIELD TESTED! — Manufacturer lacks test equipment.
  • HIGH ACCURACY! — Unit on which all parts fit.
  • FUTURISTIC! — No other reason why it looks the way it does.
  • REDESIGNED! — Previous flaws fixed — we hope.
  • DIRECT SALES ONLY! — Factory had a big argument with distributor.
  • YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT! — We finally got one to work.
  • BREAKTHROUGH! — We finally figured out a use for it.
  • MAINTENANCE FREE! — Impossible to fix.
  • MEETS ALL STANDARDS! — Ours, not yours.
  • SOLID-STATE! — Weighs more than your car.
  • HIGH RELIABILITY! — We made it work long enough to ship it.