Kids' Rules on Life

• Never trust a dog to watch your food. — Patrick, Age 10
• When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents. — Matthew, Age 12
• Never smart off to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching. — Andrew, Age 9
• Wear a hat when feeding seagulls. — Rocky, Age 9
• Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning. — Stephanie, Age 8
• Never try to hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. — Rosemary, Age 7
• Don't flush the toilet when your dad's in the shower. — Lamar, Age 10
• Never ask for anything that costs more than five dollars when your parents are doing taxes. — Carrol, Age 9
• Never bug a pregnant mom. — Nicholas, Age 11
• Don't ever be too full for dessert. — Kelly, Age 10
• When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him. — Heather, Age 16
• Never tell your mom her diet's not working. — Michael, Age 14
• Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat. — Joel, Age 12
• When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone. — Alyesha, Age 13
• Never try to baptize a cat. — Laura, Age 13
• Never spit when on a roller coaster. — Scott, Age 11
• Never do pranks at a police station. — Sam, Age 10
• Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving. — Rob, Age 10
• Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mom told you to do. — Hank, Age 12
• Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand. — Molly, Age 11
• Listen to your brain. It has lots of information. — Chelsey, Age 7
• Stay away from prunes. — Randy, Age 9
• Never dare your little brother to paint the family car. — Phillip, Age 13
• Forget the cake. Go for the icing! — Cynthia, Age 8