The Y2K "Problem"

• The seriousness of this Year 2000 problem (or "Y2K" for short) is illustrated by the huge sums of money being spent to try to avoid it. —Larry Burkett
• Actually, I think somebody just made that up, and if the Y2K problem, you know, the Year 2000 computer problem is real, nobody's proven it to me yet. ... Yeah, the worse thing happens is we shut down all the computers. You know, we can still live without computers. I can remember living in a world that had no computers at all. —Tom Clancy
• We do not know what the impact will be... even if the vast majority of problems are eliminated. Systems are very unforgiving. Software programs do not allow for a single mistake. You cannot be approximately correct. You're either right or you're wrong. —Alan Greenspan, Chairman, U.S. Federal Reserve
• We don't know which of our production machines are going to work. —Gordon Moore, co-founder of Intel and otherwise pretty bright guy, speaking in Vienna on Intel's Y2k preparedness
• Well it seems to me we ought to be encouraged that in the year 1000 they had to add a new digit, and you had no evidence of economic disruption. And then the millennium before, we had dates going down, and then they started going up, and yet no evidence of disruption or chaos in the economy, so if they could do it then, surely we could deal with it now, it seems to me. —Senator Phil Gramm, Republican from Texas
• Our greatest domestic risks for Year 2000-related failures are at the local level. —John A. Koskinen, 2K President's Council Chair (www.y2k.gov)
• Y2K, we're not familiar with that. However in regard to the "Millennium Bug" — not to worry my friend, we are prepared to spray everywhere. —Anonymous
• Our system is already Y2K compliant ... but you can improve your Y2K compliance by using the special CD, which carries out some minor fixes. —A Mr. Weisfeld, in charge of Y2K readiness in Microsoft Israel
• Y2K Rollover Passes Smoothly —Associated Press headline, January 1, 2000

Source for all but last quote: Duh-2000 (www.duh-2000.com).